Dani Sumner

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118. Those That Hurt You Can’t Heal You. There’s Hope In The Gift of a Healthy Community

Hey, friends! If you're anything like us, you've likely experienced the sting of being hurt by someone in your life. We recently delved into this topic within The Feel Better Journey group calls, where we discussed the profound concept that the people who've caused us pain often can't be the ones to bring us healing. We share more about this in Episode 118 of A Holy Mess Podcast. I hope this blesses you today. -Dani

The Longing for Healing
You know, it's a common desire to hope that those who have hurt us can be the source of our healing. A heartfelt apology or a change in their behavior could mend the wounds we feel, and in some cases, it does work, especially with smaller conflicts among friends. However, when it comes to more significant hurts like child abuse, betrayal from a spouse, or rejection from close friends, the healing journey may take a different path.

Our Deeper Wounds
The wounds from these profound hurts run deep, particularly when they come from chosen family or communities we've entrusted our lives to, such as church communities or close friends. Betrayal and rejection from such sources can cut even deeper than hurts from our biological families. The pain extends to business relationships, too, where trust can be shattered, triggering a range of emotions that need careful navigation and support.

Apologies Alone Aren't Enough
While apologies can be transformative in some cases, we've found that even when the person who hurt us sincerely apologizes and takes responsibility, it doesn't necessarily fill the void or heal the pain entirely. The scars run deep, and merely saying sorry may not be sufficient to bring true restoration.

The Power of a Healthy Community
Here's the silver lining – healthy communities can play a pivotal role in healing. Opening up to others, sharing our vulnerabilities, and acknowledging and validating our experiences create a space for healing. In these safe environments, we find people who don't try to fix us with quick solutions but instead sit with us, offering compassion and understanding.

Cultivating Healing Through Group Coaching
At The Feel Better Journey group coaching meetings, we're actively working to create such communities—safe spaces where community members can process their pain, share their stories, and receive the support they need. We believe that even though the ones who hurt us might not be the healers we need, there are compassionate, grace-filled people out there who can walk alongside us on our journey toward healing.

So, if you've been yearning for healing from the ones who've caused you the most pain, remember, you're not alone. Healing often comes from unexpected places, and being part of a supportive community can be a transformative experience. Listen to Episode 118 of A Holy Mess Podcast and reach out if you're interested in exploring The Feel Better Journey – because, in the end, healing is a journey best traveled with others in authenticity.

Let's take a moment to pray. God, help us to find the right community, even if it's just one or two people in our life, to journey with us and provide safe spaces for our hurts to come into the light and reveal pathways to healing. May you be so near to us as our tender wounds lay bare in light of your mercy and grace. Thank you, Lord, for being the ultimate healer, and your promises are true. Amen.